Happiness Unperturbed

Happiness Unperturbed.

     Happiness does not mean doing anything, it is pure happening. According to Allan Watts,

“Happiness is not a result to be attained through action, but a fact to be realized through knowledge. The sphere of action is to express it, not to gain it.”

     The definition of happiness varies with every single individual and with age. For some happiness are material possessions, for some spiritual upliftment, whereas for a cross-section of people it is neither material nor spiritual, nor does it depend on others.

How then do we get a complete picture of happiness?

     People can be happy as and when they themselves make up their mind to be. Some modern schools plan to ‘teach’ happiness in schools, to advise and advertise with marketing techniques to sell happy behaviour. They conduct classes in ‘cheeriness’ and ‘contentment’ as they think the time has come to ‘teach’ happiness. However the innumerable attempts to find and teach happiness leaves the goal and the destination blurred, unclear, a more perplexed state of mind as to where and how can happiness be found.

     According to a recent analysis conducted by a British scientist, Adrian White, through the data published by UNESCO, CIA, WHO, to create a global project of subjective well being. The first world map of “Happiness” was prepared. India is the 125^th happiest country in the world map of happiness. Denmark is the happiest country in the world, standing on the first position and Barundi in Africa is the most unhappy. Larger populations are not associated with being happy countries. According to Adrian White,

“The concept of happiness, or satisfaction with life, is currently a major area of research in economics and psychology most closely associated with new development in positive psychology.”

‘The Times Life’ supplement of the Times of India, conducted a survey among 17 to 45 years old in cities like Ahmedabad, Bangalore, Delhi, Pune, Hyderabad, Kolkata, Lucknow and Mumbai. Men and women had different happiness quotients. As many as 64 percent of women and 58 percent of men defined happiness as emotional contentment.  The surveys also revealed that Indians have innumerable reasons to be unhappy. Like hypocrisy, corruption, loneliness, boredom, loss of family and friends, uncertainty, betrayal, back-biting, negative people around them, fights in the family, etc. etc. Whereas the reasons for happiness are quite limited. 

     At the grass-root level, the happiness quotient does not depend on these theoretical observations. Happiness can be taught by teaching the qualities of patience, forgiveness, adjustments, satisfaction, etc. As poverty and greed are the worst enemies of happiness. Happiness has nothing to do with material gains or spiritual achievements, because it is a contented state of mind that brings happiness. When this contentment is not achieved, frustration and agitation creeps into one’s mind, taking him to adverse actions. Only if this contentment could be achieved, then the farmers at Vidarbha would not have committed suicide, college and school students would not attempt suicide by jumping from high storey buildings, as happiness comes from emotional satisfaction. But in the present era the reasons for emotional disturbances have increased to great levels, making it more difficult to attain peace of mind.

     A British economist, Richard Layard in his book, ‘Happiness’ says, ‘We should rededicate our society to the pursuit of happiness rather than the goal of dynamic efficiency. We need to take happiness seriously.’

     Most people at some point of time in their life are overcome by negative feelings and thoughts. The real trouble begins when this negativity becomes a habit. Negative feeling is a combination of different emotions like fear, anxiety, panic and sadness. Negative thinking also leads to many physical problems, mental stress, hypertension, heart problems, sleeplessness, etc.

 This natural negativity can be overcome to be happy. By following some key rules and using mind games every individual can eventually lead a fulfilling and contented life.

     Positive psychology was developed by Martin Seligman from the University of Pennsylvania. It focuses on how people can flourish and not on how they can become depressed. Inherent character traits and childhood experiences account 50 percent of the happiness potential. The rest can be controlled by the individual himself. As Elbert Hubbard put it, “Positive anything is better than negative nothing.”

     One key to happiness is to cultivate flow activities, hobbies or time consuming activities in which a person gets completely engrossed even forgetting the time.

     The second key is to keep the self accompanied by friends or loved ones.

According to psychologists, relationships should be intimate and should include great deal of self disclosure to result in high levels of happiness.

The central finding is that happiness can be promoted by learning to control and avoid negative thought.

Negative thoughts such as fear, boredom, and embarrassment are only over reactions and they can be controlled.

     We may not that most celebrities after achieving high status in society and gaining unlimited wealth, still remain unsatisfied, unhappy. They then wish t o do activities that give contentment to their soul. Like Bill Gates who said, “For us, happiness isn’t materialistic anymore. But trying to help those who need our resource.”

Another example is of former US President, the octogenarian Noble Laureate, Jimmy Carter, who constructed 100 houses for the poor at Malavli Village near Lonavla in Maharashtra. He has built homes for people around the world.

What is it that pulls these people out from the luxury of their palatial homes, to the sunny and dusty roads of India and Africa, to the slums and towards humanity?                  

The only reason is the quest for happiness, to seek contentment. Happiness that no amount of wealth, possessions, property and position can give. Happiness that lies only in our soul, where the only need is to find it. To search for it in small acts that brings so much of satisfaction. The feelings of brotherhood and co-operation, of helping and guiding others without expecting anything in return, serving the sick and the needy.

These activities do sound like social activities, but then man is a social animal. He cannot survive alone and cannot live a life of isolation to achieve happiness.

     Man does not need a mirror to see himself but he needs a transparent glass through which he can see people, society, and life around him. As the story goes in my previous article on ‘Gift of giving’ only then can his feelings of love, happiness, sadness, need, can be understood by him. Man need not live like a stone in a desert, but the need is to live like a beautiful stone artifact in the garden surrounded by colours, flavours, and beauty. Happiness comes with co-ordination, by knowing to tackle different people in different ways and by leaving behind the stubborn, obstinate nature, by overcoming negative thoughts and embracing change. A sage  living in a deep forest all by himself will not be happy, nor will a topmost celebrity who is always living among crowds of people be happy, unless they try to gain something for the soul, that brings them peace and tranquility. The sources may be varied, the routes may be different, but the destination will be one for all. And that is to follow the rules of nature, to believe in one supernatural power, to follow the path of humanity. As humanity has no caste, no religion, no boundaries, so also happiness has no caste or culture, no religious differences.

     The new generation has unbelievable and unrealistic expectations and desires. These desires and expectations can not be stopped but they need to be deviated towards more practical and sensible ways of achieving them. Towards more positive attitudes. Happiness is not different for the rural or urban people. May it be the major area of research, but the root cause can be inculcated from individual homes, from childhood.

    Modern methods of seeking happiness are through meditation and concentration. It is very effective and practical way of learning to control the mind and actions. It serves the purpose of keeping the mind and body in your command and thus bringing about a unity among them. It produces desirable results as it changes the aggressive, destructive, negative thoughts to positive thinking and happiness. It is the feeling of eternal bliss, of not being affected by others achievements and possessions, because every individual on earth has his own specific purpose of existence, one cannot be compared to the other. As the saying goes, “There is a cure for need, but there is no cure for greed.” When greed decreases, automatically happiness increases.

     The term ‘unperturbed’ means without concern or worries. That is what can be called as complete happiness, without any flaws. This kind of happiness radiates on a person’s face and makes the person stand out in a crowd.

‘Smile- it increases your face value’ is a famous cliché, but it is true to the core. A radiating smile from the heart shows happiness from within and also gives happiness to those around. It costs nothing but gains a lot. Because sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but at times your smile can be the source of your joy and also of others.

To put it in short, “Be humble to be happy.